The Bogan

When first properly introduced into Australian culture I learned of a mysterious persons called the Bogan of whom I had not yet encountered. Much like the "trailer trash" of the Southern United States the Bogan is a damnable creature lacking in the very basics of personal hygiene and the manners of the educated and well rounded individual. I had seen many bizarre people along my travels in Oz and believe today I have encountered and briefly followed the first real bogans of my trip. This motley group of three so inspired me to share their lives I came home straight away to type this post. This is so all of you can too enjoy those delicious 5 minutes I was stuck walking behind them getting close enough to become part of their group.

If only I hadn't taken that shower yesterday.

They say the fastest way to get from point A to point B is a straight line, bogans don't buy it. They often walk side to side swivelling and stumbling their way against flat surfaces, tempting fate on curbs and stepping over their own feet or pets. They are very distinguishable in their swagger; do not for the love of god get stuck behind a group of them. Unlike most people bogans do not sense your discomfort of being swallowed into their group as you overtake their slowly advancing wall. They will not move for you or for that matter walk in a straight line its not in their nature and chances are  they've been drinking since waking up.  The bogan will bunch up and wobble your escape opportunities out of existence. If you find yourself in on of these situations you must either,

1. Walk around on the grass or road

2. Slow down immensely and wait for a free moment to bolt through

3. Consider the distance of pub or shops and wait for them to make their way there

If for some reason you should wish to find a bogan outside of their natural habitat of the bar or the home you may find it useful to locate a trail of bottles. Bogans hydrate differently than the average human, they live almost entirely off of alcohol. For the 5 minutes I followed my bogans I only encountered the tossing of 1 bottle that, to quote the older gentleman was "weighing down" the younger and seemingly drunker. The bogan lives for today, he or she cares not for the environment but grabs life by the liter and guzzles it down damned the consequences. It is also possible theory that because of their main goal to be as drunk as possible by 3 pm the bottles may possibly map their way home, this however is unlikely considering they don't generally stray far from their habitat.

The bogan moves with the swiftness and silence of a freight train. Whether in a group or solitary they always have something to discuss with themselves or each other. They aren't shy to tell themselves aloud exactly what they are thinking and frequently enjoy testing the limits of their vocal chords. The bogans song can be heard from distances of up to .50 mile away and is a clear sign that a party whether wanted or not will be passing by your way. The solitary bogan is far rarer than the group. They like the parrots and cockatoos of Australia feel the need to congregate to make the loudest and most  irritating screeches possible; this is generally done at the hours when silence is most valued.

The age of a bogan is a difficult thing to tell. The young ones have a deceiving older than they are look about them and most drink years before legal age making them appear at least 18 to the untrained eye. The older a bogans becomes the harder it is to determine age, features especially the face get the harder and harder to read. A 40 year old bogan may very well be mistaken to be 5-10 years senior. This is true more so for the female of the species than the male.

Within their groups bogans are quite fashionable and trendy, hiply tending to embrace the 1980 and 1990s styles. Mullets are a common hairstyle amongst the men whilst the women tend to enjoy the just woke up un-brushed look. Their clothes will always have holes, this is for ventilation purposes and of course the extra beer money. Australia gets very hot its generally thought the more holes the more breeze can enter creating their own free natural air conditioning. They often shun hygiene, showers and other bathing activities. These exercises take time from their busy schedules. They are very in touch with nature so much so they often pass out in it. The smell of artificial flowers is nothing like rolling in the real nature, the stank of humanity far more pleasant to them than that of soap.

The bogan is an exciting creature worthy of future study. Unfortunately I was only in possession of an iPod and was unable to take a photo considering the loud shutter noise that is impossible to turn off and the way too close proximity. I uses escape plan #2 btw.

Easter breaks

Good news everyone, a day after my last post Oscar was found! He was half awake, mangled and riddled with infection at most a day to certain death. It seems he had been attacked by a neighbors dog or wild possum and had been too injured to get home. For 1 week he sat under a table in tercentennial downpours and cold weather being eaten alive. After a few days of recovery and surgery hes back home locked up away from harm in the "kitty motel" out front with his best buddy Lily. So happy to have spoken too soon, thats one tough kitty  I have never seen such horrible injuries on living creature, except maybe a disemboweled hamster eating its own intestines but that little guy didn't make it.

Trip of the Easter weekend was to Newcastle, NSW & Hunter Valley, Wine Region, NSW.

Not quite my hostel

Newcastle is a small beach city with historic bunkers, some of the biggest waves I have ever seen and a lighthouse to boot. It was one of the most uneventful excursions of my travels and to be perfectly honest a relaxing and well needed one. 

Newcastle is pretty awesomely only located about 3 hours outside of Sydney by train, 2 for me in Brooklyn and is the second most populated city in New South Wales. Its a big surf and body boarding town with some gorgeous little beaches, endless groups of beach bums and intimidating waves.

The first day in the city I decided to skip the town center and go directly for the beach. Looking up the place while deciding if I would visit I had seen a lighthouse and after the disappointment of Fingal bay needed to make up for my losses. It was pretty sweet to say it in the laziest way possible. The lighthouse grounds are open every Sunday for exploration, unfortunately I found out after Sunday and missed out but may make a trip back for it. There is however if you find yourself wandering on a weekday a nice rocky path past the lighthouse to the water. Body boarders sit waiting for waves in the small surf on the left and surfers or crazier body boarders sometime ride the bigger waves on the right. Its a good place to chill and watch if you don't have a board yourself.

To really get the most out of Newcastle, exploration of its history should be considered. Newcastle has a rich past filled with interesting stories, convicts and coal. Many traces of that history can still be seen all over the city, they do a good job at preserving the past and deserve to be heard. They really offer a ton of  things to do, the museum is free along with the lighthouse and Fort Scratchy, take advantage.

Carved by the fingernails of the convicts I'd imagine

The Ocean baths are a cool and helpful option for the more lax beach goers. They were somehow carved into the rock by the inmates of old Aus past and provide a sturdy and effective barrier from the madness of the sea. Newcastle on the fringes of the beach still retains a bit of old world charm, old fashioned signs and really a low key touristy feel.

Fort Scratchy has some of the best views of the city and lighthouse, it like I mentioned completely free and not to be missed. There is an option to pay for some tunnel tours as well.

One other place to go and see a bit of wild-caged-life is at Blackbutt Reserve. I shit you not. Its free also and has everything that you, if you were me, have frustratingly not seen close enough plus a million mosquitoes ready to relieve you for a few lbs of blood. Sarcasm aside it was pretty cute and you can get close to Koalas for 5 bucks, I was too bitten to partake but it looked worth it.

There's also a parrot there that loves to climb humans, you're the exhibit to that guy. Just don't try to get him off your shoulder he bites.

I shall feast upon thy fingers

My pictures sum up the sights for the most part, it was beautiful yes and I myself I wold like to say was loving it 24/7, however I was on a sugar detox (bad timing) and was quite honestly a monster. It felt like a hangover all day long without any alcohol, I had a good time when I could ignore my body's minor annoyances. Sights nom nom gorgeous, mind however screaming fuck you all. 
Ps. failed the sugar detox ill try again when Easter candy and birthdays are over.


Hunter Valley

Feeling half okay half fuck the world I departed on a wine tour at 9:15am on Monday. Hunter Valley is one of the most magnificent places I have ever been in my life, that to note may be the wine memories but I really don't think so. Never have I seen so many kangaroos all bunched up together in groups munching by the side of the road. When I thought about going to Australia I thought roos would be everywhere they are after all considered to be like deer in both abundance and road kill respect. This is the place where the American dreams of Kangaroos in Aus is true, at least the first place I've encountered.

There are over 150 wineries in the valley and it is home to some spectacular views. If you are lucky enough to get there do not just go on a tour, make it a weekend. I should have stayed longer I would have traded one day in Newcastle for 2 there hands down. Im a sucker for beautiful landscapes and the wine doesn't hurt either...

Ill pretend to be a wine snob and say my favorite vineyard of the mere 4 I visited was Constable Estate, the wine of choice, 2011 Cabernet Merlot. I had budgeted to buy 1 bottle of wine and since this was the first place we visited struggled with the choice of buying it, I didnt buy it and regretted it. So, I saved my money and will order it online as a last day Au-pairing treat. 

Plans are being made to move on as I try and make my projected bank account conform to my plans. Next stop Alice Springs? Then probably the Barrier Reef. The big picture hopes are Tasmania, New Zealand, Cambodia, Thailand and Tokyo. Then a regroup of funds before an all over UK? Europe will be hard to travel around considering its almost impossible for me to get a work visa. However like I said my plans change on the daily.

Stationary Living

Its been a while!
Firstly... 

RIP Oscar, I hope im premature saying that but at this point hes been missing for over a week. He although being an outdoor cat rarely leaves the backyard. 
Hes been as good a friend to me as a cat can be since I arrived in Brooklyn. Moment of silence for this doofus. I genuinely miss him and hope he found a family with better food than us and not become fertilizer.

He was also quite the model

 

So g'day folks sorry for the delays in posting anything but not much has been happening lately. I struggle with the posts if I don't have anything specific to say procrastination and laziness get the better of me sometimes actually most times... 

Basically on the day to day to fill the downtime I've been trying to distract myself with activities, I try for creative stuff like painting but usually just watch Netflix, which btw you have to jump through loops to be able to watch here as it is yet unavailable in this part of the world. I've been taking some online courses from a website called coursera.org. At the moment The Modern and Postmodern by Wesleyan University has taken most if not all my attention. I even write essays almost weekly for it; that today is what brings me here.

I spent an entire day last week on an essay with a serious case of procrastination / writers block only to finally get myself on the right track and find that the deadline was 5am LA time, not 5pm. Fuck. Well lets not waste this opportunity to write I though, the brick wall I've been scratching at all day took a lot to break and the blood stains still drip fresh from my repeated head bangings against its treacherous and mangled remnants.

So, funny enough this post had actually began being written a little over 2 weeks ago, its 3 separate posts combined. It was a paragraph long thought saved to blogger that I intended to write before the environmental post, the post essay thoughts and now an addition to a very brief itinerary change for my travels. I hope it flows well but I cant be bothered to separate it all.

Winter is coming in Australia and the weather shows. Two weeks of straight rain and a slightly cooler breeze in the air. Seeing no dramatic leaf change and having no Halloween to compliment the season I miss but I'm curious to see what the winter has in store down under, certainly wont be like New York. Season wise ill never prefer the summer x-mas or Easter in the fall so on that note East Coast USA 1 AUS 0. USA might disagree after this winter but think of 4 plus days of 108 degrees too... With the weather trapping me indoors it has become more apparent how boring Au-pairing is, really really boring. The kids are great but the routine is not my cup of tea I'm becoming stir crazy, cant go far on the cheap to get out of the house and don't want to brave the tercentennial downpours that appear at random once or more a day.

My distraction of classes has been a fleeting joy, sometimes im 100% student other times im blankly staring at the screen moments from drooling onto my lap. In The Modern and Postmodern (highly recommended class) last week we talked about Emerson and self-reliance, the very topic I was writing about before as the idea for my original post. Weirdly the class has followed a few of my most recent mindsets very closely. I had been thinking about myself and questioning my own sense of self-reliance over the past two weeks especially. With the weather causing a very serious travel itch I reflected that at this moment although I feel self-reliant I am not truly; pretty broke and was questioning my job the realistic options at this very moment are scarce I am a bit stuck. I started to wonder am I taking the easy way out and torturing myself mentally for it or just in a slump caused by a lack of excitement?

Over the years I've come to realize in myself that most often when I find comfort I've became most uncomfortable. It seems that being without struggle does not suit my personality, it puts me at a sense of common place and increasing nervous energy. I am the type of person who needs many outlets and strong outlets at that to take my mind away from negative thought of which I am overly prone. I generally will over think everything at the expense of happiness, any regret and fear will rear its ugly head in moments of silence and the positives are too easily buried and hidden deep under the shit.

Could the travel bug be a way for some of us to run away from our inability to deal with the ordinary? I often find myself wanting to visit home and will on the same night actually have a nightmare of it; not due to seeing any old faces or family but fear that it will be giving up and a worries I wont be able to leave again stuck in the minimum wage loop. Although the situation I find myself in now is comfortable, easy for sure I feel it too easy and slowly I slip back into negative thoughts and for really no good legitimate reason at all. I have too much time to think and my mind takes full advantage of telling me what I can do better. Old mentalities come creeping back and I look forward again, the present becoming a mere inconvenience to my plans. I always had a 3 month job limit back in NY, if I wasn't happy with my work after 3 months i'd quit. Usually this was achieved by turning off my alarm and sleeping in, never have I been happy in my work or content for a period of more than 6 months. It seems it may be the same for traveling, the 3 month limit on location.

Decisions are hardest made when the options seem endless they are especially rash and changed when traveling. I strive for more ways to support myself not having to do with finding short term work to fund my photography and travels. I cant have my life dictated by a schedule set by someone else, i've worked enough shitty jobs to know I need to find a way to support myself, that is the dream right?

Since arriving here I have changed my mind on what to do about 5 times. Major changes like returning to NY to save money for studies abroad morphed into backpacking Europe which then upon seeing the financial side got pushed forward in favor of getting a New Zealand work visa and traveling to Cambodia for a meditation retreat and general "vacation from my vacation". As of now the Cambodia & NZ is the plan with a possible NY stop in the fall for 3 months if financially possible. However the nature of my adventure is an ever morphing idea it could change tomorrow it did today when an obvious and practical option arose itself to my attention.

CAMPER VANS.

I don't know why it hadn't been in my mind before, camper vans quite literally seem the best mode of transportation for the traveler who gives zero-fucks about comfort and amenities. When searching for flights from Sydney to Alice Springs to Cairns to Darwin at an ungodly rate I never thought to just drive it. When better a time to learn to drive on the left side of the road than whilst au-pairing? It'll be a sneak peak of the terror the parents will face when their kids get old enough to learn to drive.

Stops at my discretion (photos anytime!), hostel unnecessary and overall pretty affordable? Sold.  I believe the aussie spring will be a camper van journey as well as future New Zealand. When 16 day tours of NZ range around $2000+ ill take my chances going alone for a fraction of the price. 

It wont be comfy, it will be stressful, I WILL get lost multiple times and for all you I hope my likely increasing insanity will be funny.

I cant wait.

Notes From a Dark Van coming August 2014, where wifi allows....

Easter will be spent in Newcastle NSW, beach and wine tours. Photos and stories to come.
Happy Holidays all eat more chocolate.

The future? That pretty far off, let the kids care.

When I first arrived in Australia in November I was gradually surprised with the realization that Australia was in many ways much like America. When I decided to start traveling I didn't expect the first country I visit to be the younger and fresher doppelganger of my own country. It is of course not true in all respects mainly unfortunately its the negative ones that are most similar. I will over the course of time attempt to publish posts on each of the topics individually in an ongoing thought process.

Australia's steadily declining Environmental Policies

For the first topic I think it should be noted that a major part of all of this is due to the more and more deplorable sounding Tony Abbott. An Englishman by birth and Aussie by early relocation he was elected in office September 2013 as the liberal party candidate; take note that the liberal party it is essentially the conservative party of Aus the main opposition is the Labor Party. I rarely find Aussies with nice things to say about their 28th Prime Minister and the more I come to understand his policies the more I realize why.

The endangerment of the Great Barrier Reef

If one of your dreams in life is to visit the Great Barrier Reef, hopefully you wont need to book your ticket soon. This development has occurred since I've been in country and it seems unbelievable that anyone could so knowingly endanger such a delicate and important part of the oceans ecosystem. I refer to the recent approval of a mega port for the shipment of coal passing within the Great Barrier Reef. Such a decision cannot rationally in anyway be safe for the ecosystem or more fiscally beneficial than the protection of the worlds largest reefs. Over the past 27 years about 50% of the coral has been lost to environmental factors so with the fragility of the environment in mind would a shipping port really be such a great idea? Permits for dredging have already been issued to start the process, 3 million cubic meters of sea bed will be on its way to muddy the crystal clear reefs in due time. Luckily the Australians are a proud people and have taken a stand against this stupidity, steps have been taken to stop the destruction but like all environment vs. big business fights it will not be easy. If the Liberal government has no respect for one of the natural wonders of the world what do they respect?

*

http://qldconservation.org.au/

Not Tasmania's forests, that's for sure.

Tasmania has been told to me by a very former resident to have some of the cleanest air in the world amazing hiking and an absolutely breathtaking landscape. It is also home to the Tasmanian Wilderness a World Heritage Area circa 1982.

According to The Australian Government to be found on http://www.environment.gov.au/node/19816,

"The Tasmanian Wilderness is one of the three largest temperate wilderness areas remaining in the Southern Hemisphere. The region is home to some of the deepest and longest caves in Australia. It is renowned for its diversity of flora, and some of the longest lived trees and tallest flowering plants in the world grow in the area. The Tasmanian Wilderness is a stronghold for several animals that are either extinct or threatened on mainland Australia."

Couldn't have written it any better, sounds important right? Well not to the liberal elected Will Hodgman and friend of Australia Tony Abbott. They aim to cut the extension of the heritage site set in 2013 from 120,000 hectares to 74,000 hectares. Now, it is a World Heritage Site which leaves them to certain international standards such as not fucking with it. However the most misguided policies are too often the most pursued and concerns of a struggling timber business have been presented to the World Heritage Committee for their consideration. I don't pretend to be educated on the lumber industry of Tasmania and find very biased reports on the matter but considering The Tasmanian Forest Agreement was established in 2011 with the considerations of all parties involved and still apparently has the continued support of the Tasmanian Lumber Industry, who exactly is benefiting from this? As an environmentalist at heart I tend to take the side of the trees after all the worlds oldest trees don't get that way by being cut down without any regard for conservation. A report is due out from the committee in the near future, only time will tell.

Certainly that has to be it right?

Nope. Shark Cull.

Statistics time.

"According to the Australian Shark Attack File, kept by researchers at Sydney's Taronga Conservation Society, there have been 892 shark attacks in Australia since records began in 1791,and  217 of which have been fatal."  - Australian Geographic

Its no secret shark attacks although terrifying are not common so why this past year did the Western Australian government feel the need to call for a shark cull? Because they can pretty much, shark culls are unnecessary and like the Hawaiian cull of the 70's accomplish nothing but to further destroy bits of our oceans ecosystem for human pride. The protest against the cull was widespread, some conservationists even went so far as to release a shark close to death and swim with it until it regained enough strength to survive, full story here Activists save tiger shark from cull. The fact of the matter is the ocean is an unpredictable force, from the creatures some much more dangerous than sharks to the riptides that can as so horrifyingly named rip you out to sea with no warning. We are not in control of that environment if any at all and its something we all know and need to respect. If you don't like it and aren't willing to take the risks of swimming with the inhabitants of the water, there are plenty of pools around for your enjoyment stay out of lakes though could be gators. This to me and much of the country is common sense.

Abbott doesn't believe in Global Warming, he cares nothing for the reefs of the oceans he claims to love and he openly battles the status of a World Heritage Site. He is a disaster and disgrace to his country and as an outsider I embrace the growing voice of the people of Australia.

"FUCK TONY ABBOTT"

I will be making a trip to the Great Barrier Reef as soon as I have the travel money to move on from Au-pairing, pics will be taken and I will more personally look into whats happening. Tasmania hiking trip has been on my list as well and I will likewise look into what I can in the hopes of writing a more personally researched paper, looking up figures on the computer is never as good as getting out there.